alive

found this
:.
mayb. drew this a couple of years ago.
.
it was on a hard drive on a whole other box
.
very hopeful to find happy stuff
i'll say. Especially after losing so much stuff
in about 30 minutes.
about 7 years of art in 30 minutes.
..
however, i know "art" is not really all that important
in the big scheme of things.
as a career, yes.
making an income, yes.
i don't know.
it's got to be "let go of".
.
xo = love. love eternal.
there is no other option, really
for me.
that's whut they were tellin me
.
"we will always make it out alive,
with the light of love"
.
love takes all
.
>>>>> oooo <<<<<
:.
always this conversation
in art somehow…
or in any part of life
over all the years.

no matter how low it goes
for me it
comes back up so sweetly
this is the intermittent pattern
and yet i cannot
"make it into some algorithm
and chart it out or plot it"
i don't even want to.
that is not what i want.
i want it to be real
like the velveteen rabbit or
"trees"
or breathing
or "friends"
this should be making sense
i don't want to make some poem
i am not really this
"prolific person"
i am a tired person.
..

"i told you we would make it..."
"i told you.
with Love we will all make it
please cease striving so much
how can you help anyone else
if you go out all worried like this?
it only went so far before...
are you going to carry a bucket of water
and for thirsty children
if the bucket itself is bigger than you?
but i told you even before all of this
ever even happened
this bucket and you
and all of whom you are worried about
will make it and
even more than all of that"
..
ease your worried mind
into a mind that has no worry
only good plans which have
welfare for
all
rest now
and practice living again